0x7D5 January 0x9:

I am Dr. Herbert West, from "Reanimator."
I'm right. You're wrong.

Which Random Cult Movie Character are you?
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Well, most of the time I'm right.

A couple of days ago, I realized that, what with Monde's computer's recent obscene upgrade, it can play Return To Castle Wolfenstein.

I promptly shoved that knowledge into a Dark Pit of Foreboding after discovering that, while I can find the *box* quite well, the *game* is Fnohlkhonlyknowswhere. Fnohlkh being the patron deity of keys when one's most of the way out the door.

(At this point, the Aow on my lap is interrupted in his sleep by the fact that a Miyu, standing below the chair, has noticed that his tail is dangling temptingly.)

And then, yesterday, I find... Return To Castle Wolfenstein. Not the lost one, but a new copy. No box, but it's definitely a commercial print run, and if I can find the box again, I can use its serial number, no? Written all over the CD are an assortment of badgery. 'iD' and 'Mature Audiences' and various software companies' logos.

So, I take it home. Shove it in the machine. Autoplay starts. I make a mental note to turn it off. Something that sounds like it could be Wagner, sans Valkyries, starts up. Miscellaneous and sundry reviewer quotes scroll across the screen. And, after a stream of those, it comes to the install window.

And the install window has buttons.

And I look at the buttons. They look something like
'Trailer'. 'More Trailer'.
'Screenshots from the trailer'.
'Maxim's website'.
'Install Girls of Castle Wolfenstein Screensaver'.
And a bunch of logowise graphics promoting Maxim along the bottom.

Something is missing here.

... like, maybe, Wolfenstein.

It turns out that the CD is nothing but a pile of ads for the game and Maxim, coupled to a 'screen saver' that merely scrolls pictures of three blondes and a redhead around your screen, whilst it burns an unmoving Wolfenstein logo into the upper left hand corner of the screen. And the 'Girls of Castle Wolfenstein' are ex-Playboy/Perfect 10 models wearing US uniforms.

Blah. Someone please hand me a CD rated 'Immature Audiences', kthx?


hpet on 0x7D5 January 0xB:
Wait, US, not SS? Those sick bastards. I want my swastika girls! I also got H.WEST.

Choronzon's Moving Container on 0x7D5 May 0xB:
Obligatory ~/medium-hard swat with rolled up Maxim mag, since surely Frank has a kazillion of them/~ for the use of silly chat abrvtn 'kthx'. Who are you and what have you done with Deekoo?

This green box is really nifty.


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